Addressing Helicopter Parenting and its Effects

What is Helicopter Parenting?

Helicopter parenting refers to parents that are super overprotective about their children. Just like helicopters hover, so do these parents. They involve themselves in each aspect of their children’s life and worry a lot. They are known to micromanage their children and become a part of each and everything related to them.

A psychologist reports helicopter parenting “means being involved in a child's life in a way that is over-controlling, overprotecting, and over-perfecting, in a way that's in excess of responsible parenting.”

While Helicopter Parenting might seem healthy to the parents, it can have severe effects on the children. Through this article we aim to delve deeper into it.

What are the causes of Helicopter Parenting?

Helicopter Parenting can be caused by several reasons. The following are some of the reasons:

Fear of Dire Consequences: Many times parents fear their child’s rejection from a job interview or a college team - especially if they feel that they could have done more to help. In order to avoid rejection, failure and unhappiness for their children they involve themselves in each aspect of their lives.

Overcompensation: Parents who have neglected themselves when they were growing up can overcompensate by giving extra attention to their children. This sometimes acts as a remedy for them for their upbringing.

Peer pressure from Other Parents: Parents often envy each other and try to do better from other parents . Sometimes when parents observe other parents over doing for their children, they also feel pressured to do the same at least. This leads to them becoming helicopter parents often.

Jumping Themselves by their Child's Accomplishments: Many times parents feel like their children’s accomplishments are their own and they are responsible for it. Therefore they work constantly with them to help them avoid failures and provide their level best.

What are some of the Characteristics of Helicopter Parents?

Helicopter parents might not realize that they are overstepping a line by hovering too much in their children’s lives. Hence, they do not realize that their actions might have negative effects on the wellbeing of their children. The following are some of the common characteristics of helicopter parents:

• Intervening in a teen’s life to prevent them from failing at a task or other effort.

• Monitoring a teen’s diet and exercise.

• Overseeing a high school student’s homework and school projects.

• Sending multiple texts each day to a child away at college.

• Cleaning a teen’s room for them.

• Stepping in to negotiate conflicts between a teen and their friends.

• Not allowing teens to make age-appropriate choices.

What are the Effects of Helicopter Parenting on Children ?

Helicopter parenting can have long lasting effects and psychological repercussions on children that can follow them to their adulthood as well. Here are some of the prominent effects on children:

Decreased Confidence and Self-Esteem: Helicopter Parenting often leads to the children having less faith in themselves and losing confidence. They fear that their parents don't trust them to perform tasks well.

Underdeveloped Coping Skills: Developing coping mechanisms is very crucial in teen years. However, if parents are always there to clean up their children's mess or get them out of trouble , children fail to learn coping skills.

Increased Anxiety: When parents are always around, children start fearing them and avoid having fun in their lives. The fear of their parents adds to their anxiety and makes them over conscious.

Hindered Self advocacy: Helicopter parents often advocate for their children instead of teaching them how to advocate for themselves. However kids should know how to speak up for themselves, ask for clarifications and demand for something if they need it.

What are the Effects of Helicopter Parenting on Parents?

Helicopter parenting impacts children negatively as we read above. However they can have a negative effect on the parents too. Listed are a few of these effects:

Creating barriers that might harm future relationships with their children.

Feeling angry and out of control when kids resist their involvement.

Experiencing constant anxiety about their child’s safety and choices.

Causing teens to lie to avoid the consequences of helicopter parenting.

How to avoid Helicopter Parenting?

Helicopter parents might find it hard to change their mindset and become less intervening in their children’s life. Following are a few tips to avoid helicopter parenting:

• Listen Closely to what your children actually want

• Be a coach instead of dictating them what to do

• Allow natural consequences to unfold. Let them fail for them to learn success.

• Don't manage their schedule . Just recommend.

• Don't advocate for them.

Wrapping it Up!

Helicopter parenting, marked by excessive control and involvement in the lives of children, can negatively impact both children and parents. It can decrease children's self-confidence, coping skills, and independence while causing anxiety and strained relationships. To counter these effects, parents should aim for a more balanced approach, offering guidance while allowing their children to learn from natural consequences. This shift can promote healthier development and improve family dynamics.